The present moment
slowly lumbers by
steals our perception
like wind rustling leaves
of trees planted by the stream
flowing, driving, never stopping
until you stop and watch it pass
which velocity is real?
A leaf falls into the brook
and to it’s eyes the world is rushing by
sweeping beneath and about
faster than a bouncing deer
but not quite as fast as lightning
yet to the world the passing leaf
enters and leaves and is forgotten
yes every system seems as reality
when we are in it
I was in a machine
that taught me to claw and growl
and fight and sweat to stay alive
and ahead
of those who were losing the race
by sleeping
in the sun. one day
I will have enough money to play
and relax and watch the sacred sparrow pass
singing songs about flowers in some unkown field
that I blow dust into from the gravel road
running late to work
late or scared, can’t tell which
sometimes the same
scared of wasting time or falling behind
completely unable to rest in the moment
the moment when the dew clings to the end of the leaf
not desperate, but waiting to be filled
to the point of dropping
the moment when the steam rises from the coffee
demanding my patience until the second law
has normalized the drink to a level suitable to the human pallet
the moment when the engine dies and I have no cell reception
and the impossibility of the situation leaves me lying on my back
in a bed of cutgrass, scattered in dandelions
the aphids hop onto my sweaty legs and I am slowly aware of a brook
that seems to laugh not in spite but in joy
that I have found what I was not looking for
and that I have inadvertently arrived where I was trying to drive to
like some strange children’s board game
I threw the dice that screwed up my day
and somehow landed me on the square
that the rules dictate moves me ahead ten spaces
to the moment that is now
to the present
and I am here
without strength or answers
finding that no striving serves me
any good. I am defeated
in my defeat I feel the crackling and popping
of a log slowly burning away into nothing
until I am left stranded in the present moment
without refuge or hope of return
to the wildly tumultuous stream of moments
that carried me along like a seed on the wind
waiting my whole life to be planted and grow
roots into who knows what
only to find myself upset and discontent
with my adobe pot and fill out the seven page form
in triplicates, petitioning my immediate transplantation
without a second thought to severed roots and the system shock
trees
are too slow. Tumble weeds are the way to go
but they have died because they let the wind
pull up their only source to eat
like sowing one’s mouth shut
or pouring cement in the well
all in the name of adventure or progress
or self development or a career path
the present moment lies up over the next hill
it is the promise of a quiet pool
for me to lower my sore and aching bones into
it is a paradise, but one that I have been walking in
for some time. In fact, the now has stretched from my invention
my first breathe introduced to me the miracle of life
and the blessing of every heartbeat. I was promised nothing more
indeed not even that
so I entered not reading the signs and found myself
ten miles into the reserve before I realized
that everything those old men with pinched up faces have been toiling for
has been mine for the taking since the start
I found the joy of gratefulness
and have learned with Paul the secret
of lying in a field with a busted radiator
and no care in the whole singing world
but to lie back and be completely content
knowing that I am held and that I am loved
in the present moment
and possibly the most meaningful and satisfying thing
that I can do on this earth is to admit the fact
and receive the love
Love is in the present tense
and holds me up like scaffolding
every second of life is a gift to me
that I’m learning to say thank you for
with every beat
of the heart that slowly learns
not to set it’s longings on the past
or be overcome with worry for tomorrow
but to be still and at peace in the lake of love
untroubled on the waters of God.
depthofpoetry 